Temple Jokes / Recent Jokes
A tourist is traveling with a guide through one of the thickest jungles in South America, when he comes across an ancient Mayan temple. The tourist is entranced by the temple, and asks the guide for details. To this, the guide states that archaeologists are carrying out excavations, and still finding great treasures. The tourist then queries how old the temple is.
"This temple is 1503 years old", replies the guide.
Impressed at this accurate dating, he inquires as to how he gave this precise figure.
"Easy", replies the guide, "the archaeologists said the temple was 1500 years old, and that was three years ago"
Once a Sardarji (a caste man in India ) goes to visit a temple on a top of Mt. Abu, where the roads are like a zig-zag. At the starting point towards the Temple, a man tells Sardarji that it will be better to take his car in reverse to the top of Mt. Abu as there will be no space at the top to turn around up there. So, as per the guidelines given by the man, The Sardarji, goes to the top of Mt. Abu in reverse. After sometime the Sardarji comes down of the hill in reverse.. When the man sees him, he asks the Sardarji why he came down the hill in a reverse gear. The Sardarji replies that he got some space at the top of the hill so he reversed his car.
Bholaji finds himself in dire trouble. His business has gone bust and he's in serious financial trouble.
He's so desperate that he decides to ask Bhagwan for help. He goes into the temple and begins to pray...........
"Oh Bhagwan, please help me, I've lost my business and if I don't get some money, I'm going to lose my house
as well, please let me win the lotto(lottery)".
Lotto night comes and somebody else wins it. Bholaji goes back to the temple.....................
"Bhagwan, please let me win the lotto, I've lost my business, my house and I'm going to lose my car as well".
Lotto night comes and Bholaji still has no luck!!
Back to the temple.................. "My Bhagwan, why have you forsaken me? I've lost my b siness, my house,
my car and my wife and children are starving.. don't often ask you for help and I have always been a good
servant to you. Why won't you just let me win the lotto this one time so I can more...
A man gets off a plane in Boston and heads immediately for the Men's Room. It's crowded but he finds a vacant urinal to gain relief after the long flight and many drinks.
The man at the urinal next to his says, "You're Jewish?"
"Yes."
"You come from Sudbury?"
"Yes."
"Your parents went to Temple Immanuel?"
"Yes, I don't think I know you. How do you know so much about me?"
The man next to him replies, "Rabbi Minski of Temple Immanuel is the only Rabbi I know that performs circumcisions by cutting at an angle and you're peeing in my shoe!"
I stopped believing in Santa Claus when I was six. Mother took me to see him in a department store and he asked for my autograph.
- Shirley Temple
A tourist is traveling with a guide through one of the thickest jungles in Latin America, when he comes across an ancient Mayan temple. The tourist is entranced by the temple, and asks the guide for details. To this, the guide states that archaeologists are carrying out excavations, and still finding great treasures. The tourist then queries how old the temple is.
"This temple is 2503 years old", replies the guide.
Impressed at this accurate dating, he inquires as to how he gave this precise figure.
"Easy", replies the guide, "the archaeologists said the temple was 2500 years old, and that was three years ago."