Term Jokes / Recent Jokes

NORTH POLE (API) - MICROSOFT announced an agreement with Santa Claus Industries to acquire Christmas at a press conference held via satellite from Santa's summer estate somewhere in the southern hemisphere.In the deal, Microsoft would gain exclusive rights to Christmas, Reindeer, and other unspecified inventions. In addition, Microsoft will gain access to millions of households through the Santa Sleigh. The announcement also included a notice that beginning Jan 1, 1997, Christmas and the Reindeer names would be copyrighted by Microsoft. This move was facilitated by the recently acquired MS Court.Microsoft stated its commitment to "all who have made Christmas great," and vowed to "make licensing of the Christmas and Reindeer names available to all." It is believed that the guidelines for licensing these names, due before Halloween, will be very strict. When asked "Why buy Christmas?" Bill Gates replied "Microsoft has been working on a more efficient more...

The man told his doctor that he wasn't able to do all the things around the house that he used to do.
When the examination was complete, he said, "Now, Doc, I can take it. Tell me in plain English what is wrong with me."
"Well, in plain English," the doctor replied, "you're just lazy."
"OK," said the man. "Now give me the medical term so I can tell my wife."

Spanish singer Julio Iglesias was on television with British TV host Anne Diamond when he used the word' manyana'. Diamond asked him to explain what it meant. He said that the term means "maybe the job will be done tomorrow, maybe the next day, maybe the day after that. Perhaps next week, next month, next year. Who cares?" The host turned to Irishman Shay Brennan who was also on the show and asked him if there was an equivalent term in Irish. "No. In Ireland we don't have a word to describe that degree of urgency.", replied Brennan.

Wal-Mart has transformed small towns across America, but perhaps none more so than Bentonville, where the migration of executives from major cities like New York, Boston and Atlanta has turned this former backwater into a teeming mini- metropolis populated by Hindus and Jews.
And with their arrival came the term Wal-Mart Jews, a term not embraced by the Jewish population. Having a cheap connotation, they feel that it will only add to an already prominent stereotype. "I don't like the term, but it could be worse." Says one Transfer. "We could've been the Target Muslims."

A foursome of elderly gentlemen went to the bar after a round of golf where the new Pro asked them "How did your game go today?" The first said he had a good round with 25 riders. The second said he did OK with 16 riders. The third said not too bad since I had 10 riders. The fourth was disappointed and said that he played badly with only two riders. The Pro was confounded by this term "rider" but not wanting to show his ignorance just smiled and wish them better golf the next time. He then approached Jerry the bartender and asked "Can you tell me what does this term' riders' mean?" He smiled and explained that a "rider" is when you have hit a shot long enough to take a ride on a golf cart.

A school teacher injured his back and had to wear a plaster cast around the upper part of his body. It fit under his shirt and was not noticeable at all.

On the first day of the term, still with the cast under his shirt, he found himself assigned to the toughest students in school.

Walking confidently into the rowdy classroom, he opened the window as wide as possible and then busied himself with desk work. When a strong breeze made his tie flap, he took the desk stapler and stapled the tie to his chest.

He had no trouble with discipline that term.

1. Binglish (for Bombay_English).

2. Bhindi (for Bombay_Hindi)

3. This list is perpetually incomplete since the evolution of this language can never possibly cease.

4. Bhindi/Binglish: Pronunciations are in brackets following the words.

5. Chikna - Stands for any good looking fellow. Chikna actually means smooth.

6. Keeda - An absolute pest.

7. Jhakaas - Superb. Excellent.

8. Haila! - This originated from "Hai Allah! " but I don't think 99% of the users know about this. Haila would translate to "Oh God!"

9. ChappanTikkli/Punter/Tapori/Shana - Roadside loafer. Tapori is among the most commonly used words in Bhindi.

10. Bevada / Gutter / Taankee / Batli / JohnnyWalker - A Drunk.

11. Saand - A boisterous or an exceeding brash guy.

12. Chotay - For any kid working in a Tapri. If the shop has more than one kid all would have to be more...