Tiny Jokes / Recent Jokes
A hospital patient, recovering from minor surgery, was being given an alcohol rubdown by two of the hospital's more attractive nurses.
While manipulating the man's body they noted that the word "tiny" was tattooed on the head of his penis.
Some months after the man's discharge, Mary, one of the nurses, tod Joan, the other, that she had dated their former patient.
"How could you go out with a man that had 'tiny' tattooed on his love stick?" exclaimed Joan.
"How could I indeed!" said Mary. "It said 'tiny' when it was soft, but when aroused, it spelled:
'Tiny's Delicatessen & Catering Service. We deliver at all times, twenty-four hours a day!!!'"
A hospital patient, recovering from minor surgery, was being given an alcohol rubdown by two of the hospital's more attractive nurses.While manipulating the man's body they noted that the word "tiny" was tattooed on the head of his penis.Some months after the man's discharge, Mary, one of the nurses, tod Joan, the other, that she had dated their former patient."How could you go out with a man that had 'tiny' tattooed on his love stick?" exclaimed Joan."How could I indeed!" said Mary. "It said 'tiny' when it was soft, but when aroused, it spelled:'Tiny's Delicatessen & Catering Service. We deliver at all times, twenty-four hours a day!!!'"
Bifocals Barbie
Comes with her own set of blended-lens fashion frames in six wild
colors (half-frames too!), neck chain and large-print editions of
Vogue and Martha Stewart Living.
Hot Flash Barbie
Press Barbie's bellybutton and watch her face turn beet red while
tiny drops of perspiration appear on her forehead. Comes with
hand-held fan and tiny tissues.
Facial Hair Barbie
As Barbie's hormone levels shift, see her whiskers grow. Available
with teensy tweezers and magnifying mirror.
Flabby Arms Barbie
Hide Barbie's droopy triceps with these new, roomier-sleeved
gowns. Good news on the tummy front, too - muumuus with tummy-support
panels are included.
Bunion Barbie
Years of disco dancing in stiletto heels have definitely taken
their toll on Barbie's dainty arched feet. Soothe her sores with the
pumice stone and plasters, then slip on soft terry mules.
No-More-Wrinkles Barbie
Erase those pesky crow's-feet more...
A frog goes into a bank and approaches the teller. He can see from her nameplate that her name is Patricia Whack.
"Miss Whack, I'd like to get a $30, 000 loan to take a holiday."
Patty looks at the frog in disbelief and asks his name. The frog says his name is Kermit Jagger, his dad is Mick Jagger, and that it's okay, he knows the bank manager. Patty explains that he will need to secure the loan with some collateral.
The frog says, "Sure. I have this," and produces a tiny porcelain elephant, about half an inch tall - bright pink and perfectly formed.
Very confused, Patty explains that she'll have to consult with the bank manager and disappears into a back office. She finds the manager and says, "There's a frog called Kermit Jagger out there who claims to know you and wants to borrow $30, 000, and he wants to use this as collateral." She
holds up the tiny pink elephant. "I mean, what in the world is more...
A huge guy marries a tiny girl, and at the wedding, one of his friends says to him, "How the hell do the two of you have sex?" The big guy says, "I just sit there, naked, on a chair, she sits on top, and I bob her up and down." His friend says, "You know, that don't sound too bad." The big guy says, "Well, it's kind of like jerking off, only I got somebody to talk to."
This guy walks into a bar, pulls out a tiny piano and stool, and a tiny little man. The tiny man sits down, and starts to play the piano. This other guy notices it. Hey, what's that? A twelve-inch pianist. Ya see, I found this magic lamp, rubbed it, made a wish, I got a twelve inch pianist. Can I try? The man with the piano agrees and a minute later, a million ducks fill the room. Ducks? I didn't wish for a million ducks, I wished for a million bucks!, p> Ya think I really wished for a twelve inch pianist?
On the first day of Christmas my puppy gave to me,
The Santa topper from the Christmas tree.
On the second day of Christmas my puppy gave to me,
Two leaking bubble lights,
And the Santa topper from the Christmas tree.
On the third day of Christmas my puppy gave to me,
Three punctured ornaments,
Two leaking bubble lights,
And the Santa topper from the Christmas tree.
On the fourth day of Christmas my puppy gave to me,
Four broken window candles,
Three punctured ornaments,
Two leaking bubble lights,
And the Santa topper from the Christmas tree.
On the fifth day of Christmas my puppy gave to me,
Five chewed-up stockings,
Four broken window candles,
Three punctured ornaments,
Two leaking bubble lights,
And the Santa topper from the Christmas tree.
On the sixth day of Christmas my puppy gave to me,
Six yards of soggy ribbon,
Five chewed-up stockings,
Four broken window candles,
Three punctured more...