Undressed Jokes / Recent Jokes

A husband and wife were driving down a country lane on their way to visit some friends. They came to a muddy patch in the road and the car became bogged. After a few minutes of trying to get the car out by themselves, they saw a young farmer coming down the lane, driving some oxen before him.
The farmer stopped when he saw the couple in trouble and offered to pull the car out of the mud for $50. The husband accepted and minutes later the car was free. The farmer turned to the husband and said, “You know, you’re the tenth car I’ve helped out of the mud today. ”
The husband looks around at the fields incredulously and asks the farmer, “When do you have time to plough your land? At night? ”
“No, ” the young farmer replied seriously, “Night is when I put the water in the hole. ”
Once upon a time, there was a little old man that really took care of his body. He lifted weights and jogged 6 miles everyday. One morning he looked in the mirror and was more...

The woman had been away for two days visiting a sick friend in another city.
When she returned, her little boy greeted her by saying, "Mommy, guess what!
Yesterday I was playing in the closet in your bedroom and Daddy came into the
room with the lady next door and they got undressed and got into your bed and
then Daddy got on top of her..."
Sonny's mother held up her hand. "Not another word. Wait till your father
comes home and then I want you to tell him exactly what you've just told me."
The father came home. As he walked into the house, his wife said, "I'm
leaving you. I'm packing now and I'm leaving you."
"But why-" asked the startled father.
"Go ahead, Sonny. Tell Daddy just what you told me."
"Well," Sonny said, "I was playing in your bedroom closet and Daddy came
upstairs with the lady next door and they got undressed and got into bed and
Daddy got on top of her more...

The woman had been away for two days visiting a sick friend in another city. When she returned, her little boy greeted her by saying, "Mommy, guess what! Yesterday I was playing in the closet in your bedroom and daddy came into the room with the lady next door and they got undressed and got into your bed and then daddy got on top of her..."
Sonny's mother held up her hand. "Not another word. Wait till your father comes home and then I want you to tell him exactly what you've just told me."
The father came home. As he walked into the house, his wife said, "I'm leaving you. I'm packing now and I'm leaving you."
"But why-" asked the startled father.
"Go ahead, Sonny. Tell daddy just what you told me."
"Well," Sonny said, "I was playing in your bedroom closet and daddy came upstairs with the lady next door and they got undressed and got into bed and daddy got on top of her and then they did just what you more...

A beautiful woman walked into an orchard and found a lovely pool in it. She decided to go skinny-dipping. She looked around, didn't see anyone, and undressed. Just as she was about to dive in, the orchard owner appeared from behind the bush where he was hiding all along and told her that swimming was prohibited.
"You could have told me that before I undressed!" she scolded him.
He replied, "Swimming is prohibited, undressing isn't."

HUNCHBACK'S WIFE: I'm getting worried about that back of yours. It looks really awful. Perhaps you should see a doctor. Eventually, after a lot of persuasion the Huchback goes to the doctor.
DOCTOR: I want you to get undressed. ( Hunchback removes jacket then stops)
HUNCHBACK: I don't like getting undressed.
DOCTOR: If you want me to examine your back you'll have to get undressed. ( Hunchback removes his shirt but leaves his vest on.)
HUNCHBACK: I don't like showing people my back. They always laugh at me.
DOCTOR: Do you want me to examine your back or not? ( Very reluctantly the hunchback removes his vest ( woollen undergarment in UK ))
DOCTOR: How long is it since you were at school?
HUNCHBACK: Over 30 years. Why?
DOCTOR: Did you ever wonder what happened to your backpack

HUNCHBACK'S WIFE: I'm getting worried about that back of yours. It looks really awful. Perhaps you should see a doctor. Eventually, after a lot of persuasion the Huchback goes to the doctor.
DOCTOR: I want you to get undressed. ( Hunchback removes jacket then stops)
HUNCHBACK: I don't like getting undressed.
DOCTOR: If you want me to examine your back you'll have to get undressed. ( Hunchback removes his shirt but leaves his vest on.)
HUNCHBACK: I don't like showing people my back. They always laugh at me.
DOCTOR: Do you want me to examine your back or not? ( Very reluctantly the hunchback removes his vest ( woollen undergarment in UK ))
DOCTOR: How long is it since you were at school?
HUNCHBACK: Over 30 years. Why?
DOCTOR: Did you ever wonder what happened to your backpack?