Wont Jokes / Recent Jokes

An agriculture student said to a farmer: "Your methods are too old fashioned. I wont be surprised if this tree will give you less than twenty pounds of apples.""I wont be surprised either," said the farmer, "this is an orange tree".

When you call us to have your computer moved be sure to leave it buried under half a ton of postcards baby pictures stuffed animals dried flowers bowling trophies and childrens art. We dont have a life and we find it deeply moving to catch a fleeting glimpse of yours.

Dont write anything down. Ever. We can play back the error messages from here.

When an I. T. person says he is coming right over go for coffee. That way you wont be there when we need your password. Its nothing for us to remember 700 screen saver passwords.

When you call the help desk state what you want not whats keeping you from getting it. We dont need to know that you cant get into your mail because your computer wont power on at all.

When I. T. support sends you an E-Mail with high importance delete it at once. We are just testing.

When an I. T. person is eating lunch at his desk walk right in and spill your guts right out. We exist only to more...

Why wont a witch wear a flat cap? Because theres no point in it.

1. Bicycles don't pregnant.
2. You can ride your bicycle any time of the month.
3. Bicycles don't have parents.
4. Bicycles don't whine unless something is really wrong.
5. You can share your bicycles with your friends.
6. Bicycles don't care how many other bicycles you've ridden.
7. When riding, you and your bicycle can arrive at the same time.
8. Bicycles don't care how many other bicycles you have now.
9. Bicycles don't care if you look at other bicycles.
10. Bicycles don't care if you buy bicycle magazines.
11. You'll never hear, "Suprise, you're goning to own a new bicycle" unless you go out and buy one yourself.
12. If your bicycle goes flat, you can fix it.
13. If your bicycle is too loose, you can tighten it.
14. If your bicycle gets misaligned, you don't have to discuss politics with it.
15. You can have a black bicycle and bring it home to your parents.
16. You don't have to be jealous of more...

1. You can stare at any Girl.......
2. You don`t have to spend money on her.
3. You won`t get boring result in ur board papers.
4. No girlfriend, no emotional blackmailing.
5. If u don`t have a girlfriend, she can`t dump u.
6. Having a girlfriend is hot, not having a girlfriend is automatically cool, and every one loves to be a cool guy.
7. This can be more to life than just waiting for the bloody phone to ring.
8. You won`t have to tolerate someone else defining, "right" and "wrong" for u.

9. Girlfriend can get so possessive that you can`t do anything according ur wishes anymore.

10. You can buy gifts for mom, dad, sis or grandpa instead of a girlfriend and have a happier family life.

11. You won`t have to waste paper writing love letters. No more endless waiting for ur date to arrive at some weird shop place.

12. You can have more friends, as u will have more time for more...