Wrestling Jokes / Recent Jokes

In a study published in "Pediatrics" magazine, teens who watch pro wrestling are more prone to violent behavior. The behavior, however, is scripted.

You bought a VCR so you could tape wrestling while you are at work.

Our story begins at the Olympics, specifically the wrestling event. It is narrowed down to the Russian or the American for the gold medal. Before the final match, the American wrestler's trainer came to him and said, "Now don't forget all the research we've done on this Russian. He's never lost a match because of this "pretzel" hold he has. Whatever you do, don't let him get you in this hold! If he does, you're finished!"
The wrestler nodded in agreement. Now, to the match: The American and the Russian circled each other several times looking for an opening. All of a sudden the Russian lunged forward, grabbing the American and wrapping him up in the dreaded pretzel hold!
A sigh of disappointment went up from the crowd, and the trainer buried his face in his hands for he knew all was lost. He couldn't watch the ending.
Suddenly there was a horrible scream, and a resounding cheer from the crowd. The trainer raised his eye just in time to see the more...

The Russian wrestling team and American wrestling team are having a 5-on-5 exhibition match. Both teams are down to their final wrestlers, tied at two wins apiece. The remaining American wrestler is 5'10", 175lbs., and his Russian counterpart is 6'7", 300lbs and all muscle. The American coach sends his wrestler into the match with little hope of winning. As expected, the Russian has with way with the American. Suddenly, the American explosively turns the match around, pins the Russian, and gains the victory for the American team.
The American wrestler returns to the sidelines where the coach asks him, "Son, how were you able to defeat that big Russian? Honestly, I didn't give you much of a chance."
The wrestler says, "Well, coach, when he had me down on the ground all rolled up, I saw a pair of nuts dangling in front of my face, and I just bit them as hard as I could."
The coach is shocked. "That's how you beat him?!"
"Hell more...

Did you see the headline today? "WWF: Global warming to destroy 60% of Amazon by 2030?"

I don't get it. I mean, this sort of news might be important to investment planners, but I've never even shopped there!

And when did wrestlers become scientists, anyway?

Near the end of high school, I became a trained professional wrestler and thought about pursuing it after I finished school, although my parents were not keen on that idea at all. Then I switched to stand-up comedy, and all of a sudden my parents became very supportive and encouraging. Basically the message they sent me was that it's okay for me to have a drug problem, as long as I'm not grabbing another guy's ass while doing it.

You might be a redneck if you believe All-Star Wrestling!