Write Jokes / Recent Jokes

"Dad, can you write in the dark?""I think so. What is it you want me to write?""Your name on this report card."

What do young ghosts write their homework in?
Exorcise books.

A man who had been in a mental institution for some years finally improved to the point where it was thought he might be released. The psychiatrist that ran the institution decided it was better to proceed with caution, and chose to interview him first. "Tell me," said the doctor, "if we release you, as we are considering, what do you plan to do with your life?" The inmate said, "It would be wonderful to get back to real life, and if I do, I will certainly refrain from making my former mistake. I was a nuclear physicist, you see, and it was the stress of my work in weapons research that helped to put me here. If I am released, I shall limit myself to work in pure theory, where I believe the situation will be less difficult and stressful." "Wonderful," said the psychiatrist. "Or else," continued the patient, "I might teach. There is something to be said for dedicating your life to expanding the knowledge of young people." more...

How come you never write e-mails? I'd rather send a note!

A man who had been in a mental institution for some years finally improved to the point where it was thought he might be released. The psychiatrist that ran the institution decided it was better to proceed with caution, and chose to interview him first.
"Tell me," said the doctor, "if we release you, as we are considering, what do you plan to do with your life?"
The inmate said, "It would be wonderful to get back to real life, and if I do, I will certainly refrain from making my former mistake. I was a nuclear physicist, you see, and it was the stress of my work in weapons research that helped to put me here. If I am released, I shall limit myself to work in pure theory, where I believe the situation will be less difficult and stressful."
"Wonderful," said the psychiatrist.
"Or else," continued the patient, "I might teach. There is something to be said for dedicating your life to expanding the knowledge of young more...

Little Johnny came into the kitchen where his mother was making

dinner. His birthday was coming up and he thought this was a

good time to tell his mother what he wanted.



"Mom, I want a bike for my birthday." Little Johnny was a bit of

a troublemaker. He had gotten into trouble at school and at home.

Johnny's mother asked him if he thought he deserved to get a bike

for his birthday.



Little Johnny, of course, thought he did.

Johnny's mother wanted Johnny to reflect on his behavior over

the last year. "Go to your room, Johnny, and think about how

you have behaved this year.

Then write a letter to God and tell him why you deserve a bike

for your birthday." Little Johnny stomped over to his room and

sat down to write God a letter.



Letter 1:

Dear God,

I have been more...

A man who had been in a mental institution for some years finally improved to the point where it was thought he might be released. The psychiatrist that ran the institution decided it was better to proceed with caution, and chose to interview him first.
"Tell me," said the doctor, "if we release you, as we are considering, what do you plan to do with your life?"
The inmate said, "It would be wonderful to get back to real life, and if I do, I will certainly refrain from making my former mistake. I was a nuclear physicist, you see, and it was the stress of my work in weapons research that helped to put me here. If I am released, I shall limit myself to work in pure theory, where I believe the situation will be less difficult and stressful."
"Wonderful," said the psychiatrist.
"Or else," continued the patient, "I might teach. There is something to be said for dedicating your life to expanding the knowledge of young more...