"‘Twas two weeks past elections" joke

when all through Palm Beach.
Only lawyers were stirring, the blood sucking leech.
The ballots were held to the light with great care,
In hopes that a dot or a dimple'd be there.
The voters were nestled all snug in their beds,
while nightmares of hanging chads danced in their heads.
And Bush back in Austin, and Gore in DC,
Had just rattled the courts over votes absentee.
When out on the beach there arose such a clatter,
The counters stopped counting to see what's the matter.
Away to the shore lawyers flew like a flash,
The out of state protesters started to clash.
When what to our wondering eyes was bestowed,
But Air Force One and eight interns in tow.
What came off the plane gave us all quite a chill,
We knew in a moment ‘twas our buddy Bill.
More buxom than hookers, his courses they came,
And he whistled and shouted and called them by name.
Now Bambi, Now Suzie! Now Candy and Tasha!
On Cassie! On Dana! On Patsy and Sasha!
So up to the courthouse the courses they flew,
Arms full of subpoenas, and Hillary too.
He was chubby and plump, a jolly old geezer,
I laughed when I saw him, misguided appeaser.
A wink of his eye and a twist of his head,
Told all of us there, we had something to dread.
He spoke not a word to the Canvassing Board,
The ballots and punch cards he started to hoard.
He sprang from the courthouse, away to the jet,
Before they all left, he made one final threat.
I'm tired of the lawsuits, the counting, the strife,
So I'm making myself your leader for life.
If that's not enough and for those who want more,
My wonderful wife will replace poor Al Gore.
We heard him exclaim as he flew out of sight,
"Merry Christmas to all, the GOP bites" Seasonal
Angels Explained By Children II "When an angel gets mad, he takes a deep breath and counts to ten. And when he lets out his breath, somewhere there's a tornado.
Reagan, 10
Angels have a lot to do and they keep very busy. If you lose a tooth, an angel comes in through your window and leaves money under your pillow. Then when it gets cold, angels go north for the winter.
Sara, 6
Angels live in cloud houses made by God and his son, who's a very good carpenter.
Jared, 8
All angels are girls because they gotta wear dresses and boys didn't go for it.
Antonio, 9
My angel is my grandma who died last year. She got a big head start on helping me while she was still down here on earth.
Katelynn, 9
Some of the angels are in charge of helping heal sick animals and pets. And if they don't make the animals get better, they help the child get over it.
Vicki, 8
What I don't get about angels is why, when someone is in love, they shoot arrows at them.
Sarah, 7