"AIDS or Alzheimer's?" joke

Hot 4 years ago

A guy says to his friend, "I can't remember if the doctor told me my wife has AIDS or Alzheimer's."
His friend says, "It's simple. Drive her to the other side of town. If she finds her way home, don't fuck her."

If Ida Lupino married George Wendt, then divorced him to marry Ted Danson, divorced him to marry Alan Alda, then divorced him to marry Ted Knight, and divorced him to marry Shelly Long, she'd be Ida Wendt Danson Alda Knight Long.
If Whoopi Goldberg married Peter Cushing, more...

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your hairline so far back i thought u went bald in 3rd grade

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A woman was leaving a 7-11 with her morning coffee when she noticed a most unusual funeral procession approaching the nearby cemetery. A long black hearse was followed by a second long black hearse about 50 feet behind. Behind the second hearse was a solitary woman walking a pit more...

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A cop pulled a guy over for speeding at which time the following conversation was exchanged:
Cop: May I see your driver's license?

Driver: Sorry, I don't have one. It was suspended when I got my 5th DUI.

Cop: May I see the owner's card for the more...

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Virgin Mary wanted to visit Hell, so she went to God and asked if she might do so. "Yes," God said. "I have only one warning for you. You must stay away from booze, drugs and men. Will you promise me so?" "Yes," Virgin Mary said. "And remember more...

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adam:jk lol it was horrible
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adam:jk lol, it was horrible
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Drake proctor:Bloody hell
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Drake proctor:Oh hi *gets head chopped off
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jssj:dslgkjbkjfjkfjdjf
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jssj:dslgkjbkjfjkfjdjf
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jssj:dslgkjbkjfjkfjdjf
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OG DEMO:YO HAIRLINE IS LIKE A TIMELINE IT CAN GO BACK TO 1534
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yomainbitch!:wow that wuz so fuckin awsum!! bro! /.\
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me:after dinner i did a shit, i reverves it's, soon after desert i did another
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Funny Joke? 214 vote(s). 82% are positive. 23 comment(s).