"A 70-year-old man has never been married..." joke
A 70-year-old man has never been married. One day he meets a beautiful 17-year-old girl, and it is love at first sight. They get married and go to Florida for their honeymoon. When they get back, his friend says to him, "So, tell me, how was it?""Oh, it was beautiful," says the man. "The sun, the surf, we made love almost every night, we-"His friend interrupts him. "A man your age! How did you make love almost every night?""Oh," says the man, "we almost made love Monday, we almost made love Tuesday..."
The 70-year-old man sat down in the orthopedic surgeon's office. "You know, Doc," he said, "I've made love in more exotic cars than anyone I know. Must be at least a thousand." "And now, I suppose, you want me to treat you for the arthritis you got from more...
Freedom is not the right to do as you please, but the liberty to do as you ought.
Your Moma is so poor when I saw her wobbling down the strret with one shoe, I hollered-"lost a shoe", and she said-"Nope... just found one..."
Your Momma is so poor, she saw a burning cigerette and started singing, clap your hands, and stomp your feet, praise the lord we got heat!