"A Musical Discovery" joke
A medical student was in the morgue one day after classes, getting a little practice in before the final exams.
He went over to a table where a body was lying face down. He removed the sheet over the body and to his surprise he found a cork in the corpse's rectum. Figuring this was fairly unusual, he pulled the cork out, and to his surprise, music began playing "On the road again. .. Just can't wait to get on the road again. .."
The student was amazed, and placed the cork back in the rectum. The music stopped. Totally freaked out, the student called the Medical Examiner over to the corpse.
"Look at this. This is really something!" the student told the examiner as he pulled the cork back out again.
"On the road again. .. Just can't wait to get on the road again. .."
"So what?" - the Medical Examiner replied, obviously unimpressed with the student's discovery.
"But isn't that the most amazing thing you've ever seen?" asked the student.
"Are you kidding?" replied the Examiner, "Any asshole can sing country music."
2 Scousers are riding along the M62 from Manchester to Liverpool on a motorbike. They break down and start hitching a lift. A friendly trucker stops to see if he can help and the scousers ask him for a lift.
He tells them he has no room in the wagon as he is carrying 20, more...
Knock Knock
Who's there!
Duncan!
Duncan who?
Duncan make your garden grow better! Knock Knock
Who's there!
Duncan!
Duncan who?
Duncan disorderly again! Knock Knock
Who's there!
Duncan!
Duncan who?
Duncan buscuits in more...
Dear Mom and Dad,
Our scoutmaster told us all to write to our parents in case you saw the flood on TV and worried. We are OK. Only one of our tents and two of our sleeping bags got washed away. Luckily none us got drowned because we were all up on the mountain looking for more...
What is the definition of eternity?
Four blondes in four cars at a four way intersection.