"A collection of insults 36" joke

One diamond short of a ring.

One dimension short of reality.

One drool bib short of neat and tidy.

One drop short of an empty bladder.

One flower short of an arrangement.

One flying buttress short of a cathedral.

One Froot Loop shy of a full bowl.

One fruit short of a basket.

One gene short of a full chromosome.

One goose short of a gaggle.

One handle short of a suitcase.

One hot pepper short of an enchilada.

One inspection short of passing.

One live brain cell away from being a talking monkey.

One miracle wouldn't be enough to help him.