"Act" joke
A man took his wife to a Broadway show.
During the first intermission he had to attend to nature's call in the worst way, so he hurried to find the bathrooms. He searched in vain for the bathrooms, but he finally found a beautiful fountain with foliage, and since nobody was watching, so he decided to take a relieve himself right there.
When he finally got back into the auditorium, the second act had already begun. He searched in the dark until he found his wife. "Did I miss much of the second act?" he asked.
"Miss it?" she said, "You were in it!"
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