"After 60 Years of Marriage" joke
An elderly couple were sitting on their front porch one evening, when the wife picks up her cane and whaps her husband across the shins. "Jesus Christ, woman! What the hell was that for?" he yells. "That's for 60 years of bad sex." she replies. A few minutes later, the husband picks up his cane and whaps his wife across the shins. "Ow!!" she yells. "What the hell was THAT for??" The husband looks at her and says, "That's for knowing the difference."
A young woman goes into the doctor's office for a checkup. As she takes off her blouse, he notices a red "H" on her chest. "How did you get that mark on your chest?" asks the doctor. "Oh, my boyfriend went to Harvard and he's so proud of it that he never more...
Two cats: Felix & Un-deux-trois, decided to have a race to see who could swim across the river first.Guess who won? Felix! Because Un-deux-trois cat sank.
(Un deux trois quatre cinq)
Knowledge is knowing a tomato is a fruit; Wisdom is not putting it in a fruit salad.
Three ministers - a Presbyterian, a Methodist, and a Baptist - and their wives were on a cruise. A tidal wave came up and swamped the ship; they all drowned, and before long, they were standing before St. Peter.
First came the Presbyterian and his wife. St. Peter more...
2 Scousers are riding along the M62 from Manchester to Liverpool on a motorbike. They break down and start hitching a lift. A friendly trucker stops to see if he can help and the scousers ask him for a lift.
He tells them he has no room in the wagon as he is carrying 20, more...