"Bass Players" joke
Bassists are not terribly smart. The best bassists come to terms with their limitations by playing simple lines and rarely soloing.
During the better musical moments, a bassist will pull his strings hard and grunt like an animal. Bass players are built big, with paws for hands, and they are always bent over awkwardly. If you talk to the bassist during a break, you will not be able to tell whether or not he's listening.
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