"Birth Control" joke
There were several women sitting around talking at their weekly club meeting.The topic of birth control came up and they started
comparing methods.
The first woman said that she and her husband relied on the pill. It
had been effective for them since they had started using it after
their 4th child was born.
The second woman said that she used the rhythm method. But she hated
having to watch the calendar.
The third woman said that she used condoms, but wished that her
husband would remember to buy them himself.
The fourth woman said
that she and her husband had found the perfect prevention method.
They used the "saucer and pail" method. All ears were opened at that
comment. She went on to explain... Her husband is shorter than
she, so he stands on a pail whenever they make love, and when his
eyes get as big as saucers, she kicks the pail out from underneath
him.
How many letters are in the alphabet?
There are 11 letters in "THE ALPHABET"
Did you say 26? :)
A man was helping one of his cows give birth, when he noticed his 5-year-old son standing wide-eyed at the fence, taking in the whole event.
The man thought, "Oh, this is just great... he's only 5 and I'm going to have to start explaining all about the birds and the more...
Give a man a fish and he will eat for a day. Teach him how to fish, and he will sit in a boat and drink beer all day.
Q: What's the difference between a pregnant woman and a lightbulb?
A: You can un-screw a lightbulb!
What is the definition of eternity?
Four blondes in four cars at a four way intersection.