"Chat up line." joke

I was chatting up a girl last night. I said, "Is your dad a thief?"
She said, "Why, because he stole the stars and put them in my eyes?"
I said, "No, because you're a scouser."

What is the difference between a faggot and a refridgerator?
The fridge dont fart when you pull the meat out.

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A lawyer and a blonde are sitting next to each other on a long flight from LA to NY. The lawyer leans over to her and asks if she would like to play a fun game. The blonde just wants to take a nap, so she politely declines and rolls over to the window to catch a few more...

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Person 1: Knock, Knock
Person 2: Who's there?
Person 1: Cows go.
Person 2: Cows go who?
Person 1: No, silly! Cows go moo!

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You know your a redneck if u go to a family renuion looking for a girlfriend

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What do you get when you cross a rooster with an owl?
A cock that stays up all night.

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