"Chuck Norris died years ago than reapears just to ..." joke

Knowledge is knowing a tomato is a fruit; Wisdom is not putting it in a fruit salad.

Ya mama so fat the only thing stopping her from going to Jenny Craig is the door.

- Yo Mama's so fat, she couldn't fit in a satellite photo.
- Yo Mama's so fat, she's on both sides of the family.
- Yo Mama's so fat, when she fell over, she rocked herself asleep trying to get up again.
- Yo Mama's so fat, when she sat on a dollar bill, blood came more...

The atom bomb isn’t real.. It’s just Chuck falling out a plane and punching the ground..

Your Mamma's so fat, when she went bungee jumping, she broke the bridge!