"Cold turkey" joke
It was xmas day. a little toddler was crawling round the house, spying on his older sister, brother, mum and dad. Later that day, the fathers boss an his wife were coming round for xmas dinner..
First, he stood outside his sister room and listened to a conversation she was having with her friend "Shes a right bitch... and hes a bastard too" the little boy didnt know what these words meant, so he ased his sister "erm... it means ladies and gentlemen" she said.
Satisfied, he went upstairs, where is mum was applying her makeup. clumsily, she dropped her lipstick andsaid "shit!" again the little boy didnt know this word "it means makeup, son", she said.
Finally, the boy went down to see his dad, who was carving the turkey. He accidently sliced his finger with the sharp knife. obviously in pain, he cried out "fuck!" yet again, the little boy wanted to know what this word meant. "it means carving" he said.
10 minutes later the guests arrive. the boy answers the door. "hello bitches and bastrds, please come in. my mums upstairs putting shit on her face and my dads in the kitchen fucking the turkey"
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