"Corporate Lessons" joke

> Lesson number one
> ----------------
> A crow was sitting on a tree, doing nothing all day. A small
> rabbit saw the crow, and asked him, "Can I also sit like you and do
> nothing all day long?"
>
> The crow answered: "Sure, why not." So, the rabbit sat on the ground below
> the crow, and rested.
> All of a sudden, a fox appeared, jumped on the rabbit and ate it.
>
> Moral of the story is:
> To be sitting and doing nothing, you must be sitting very, very
> high up.
>
> Lesson number two
> ----------------
> A turkey was chatting with a bull.
> "I would love to be able to get to the top of that tree," sighed
> the turkey, "but I haven't got the energy."
> "Well, why don't you nibble on some of my droppings?" replied the
> bull. They're packed with nutrients."
> The turkey pecked at a lump of dung and found that it actually gave him
> eough strength to reach the first branch of the tree.
>
> The next day, after eating some more dung, he reached the second branch.
> Finally after a fornight, there he was proudly perched at the top of the
> tree. Soon he was promptly spotted by a farmer, who shot the turkey out
> of the tree.
>
> Moral of the story:
> Bullshit might get you to the top, but it won't keep you there.
>
> Lesson number three
> -----------------
> When the body was first made, all the parts wanted to be Boss.
> The brain said, " I should be Boss because I control the whole
> body's responses and functions."
> The feet said, " We should be Boss as we carry the brain about and get him
> to where he wants to go."
> The hands said, " We should be the Boss because we do all the work and
> earn all the money."
> And so it went on and on with the heart, the lungs and the eyes
> until finally the asshole spoke up. All the parts laughed at the idea
> of the asshole being the Boss. So the asshole went on strike, blocked
> itself up and refused to work.
>
> Within a short time the eyes became crossed, the hands clenched, the feet
> twitched, the heart and lungs began to panic and the brain fevered.
>
> Eventually they all decided that the asshole should be the Boss, so the
> motion was passed. All the other parts did all the work while the Boss
> just sat and passed out the shit!
>
> Moral of the story:
> You don't need brains to be a Boss - any asshole will do.