"Dead chicken trying to get to Heaven" joke
Little John had a pet-chicken. He fed the chick each day and cared for her, but one day, to his shock, he found the chicken laying on her back, legs up high and mouth wide open. John ran to his father and asked him to come and take a look.
Dad came, glanced at the chicken, turned to his son and explained - "I'm sorry, Johnny, but your chicken has died. Look, how the legs are pointing up high to the sky, as if she was trying to get faster up to Heaven, to be with God!"
Next day, when dad came back from work, he found Johnny waiting for him. Before he could even get out of the car, Johnny was yelling: "Dad, dad! We almost lost our Mum today! I heard a noise and went to look for her and found her on her back on kitchen table!
And, dad, her legs were up, too, pointing to the sky as if she wanted to get there faster! And she was screaming 'Oh, God, I'm coming! Oh, God, I'm coming' and she kept on reapeating 'Yes! Yeees! Faster!'"
Then Johnny nodded and added with great relief "Isn't it glad, that uncle Tim was here and held her down on that table? Cause, you know, her screams were so loud it was pretty clear she really-really wanted to get to see God!"
Not enough votes...