"Disorder In The Court" joke

Things people actually said in court, word for word:
Q: What is your date of birth?
A: July fifteenth.
Q: What year?
A: Every year. Q: What gear were you in at the moment of the impact?
A: Gucci sweats and Reeboks. Q: This myasthenia gravis-does it affect your memory at all?
A: Yes.
Q: And in what ways does it affect your memory?
A: I forget.
Q: You forget. Can you give us an example of something that you've forgotten? Q: All your responses must be oral, OK? What school did you go to?
A: Oral. Q: How old is your son-the one living with you?
A: Thirty-eight or thirty-five, I can't remember which.
Q: How long has he lived with you?
A: Forty-five years. Q: What was the first thing your husband said to you when he woke that morning?
A: He said, "where am I Cathy?"
Q: And why did that upset you?
A: My name is Susan. Q: And where was the location of the accident?
A: Approximately milepost 499.
Q: And where is milepost 499?
A: Probably between milepost 498 and 500. Q: Sir, what is your IQ?
A: Well I can see pretty well I think. Q: Did you blow your horn or anything?
A: After the accident?
Q: Before the accident.
A: Sure, I played horn for ten years. I even went to school for it. Q: Do you know if your daughter has ever been involved in the voodoo occult?
A: We both do.
Q: Voodoo?
A: We do.
Q: You do?
A: Yes, voodoo. Q: Trooper, when you stopped the defendant, were your red and blue lights flashing?
A: Yes.
Q: Did the defendant say anything when she got out of her car?
A: Yes sir.
Q: What did she say?
A: What disco am I at? Q: Now doctor, isn't it true that when a person dies in his sleep, he doesn't know about it until the next morning? Q: The youngest son, the twenty-year old, how old is he? Q: Were you present when your picture was taken? Q: Was it you or your younger brother who was killed in the war? Q: Did he kill you? Q: How far apart were the vehicles at the time of the collision? Q: You were there until the time you left, is that true? Q: How many times have you committed suicide? Q: So the date of conception (of the baby) was August 8th?
A: Yes.
Q: And what were you doing at that time? Q: She had three children, right?
A: Yes.
Q: How many were boys?
A: None.
Q: Were there any girls? Q: You say the stairs went down to the basement?
A: Yes.
Q: And these stairs, do they go up also? Q: Mr. Slatery, you went on a rather elaborate honeymoon, didn't you?
A: I went to Europe, sir.
Q: And you took your new wife? Q: How was your first marriage terminated?
A: By death.
Q: And by whose death was it terminated? Q: Can you describe the individual?
A: He was about medium height and had a beard.
Q: Was this a male or a female? Q: Is your appearance here this morning pursuant to a deposition notice which I sent to your attorney?
A: No, this is how I dress when I go to work. Q: Doctor, how many autopsies have you performed on dead people?
A: All my autopsies are performed on dead people. Q: Do you recall the time that you examined the body?
A: The autopsy started around 8:30 p.m.
Q: And Mr. Dennington was dead at the time?
A: No, he was sitting on the table wondering why I was doing an autopsy.