"Dogs Vs Man" joke

How Dogs and Men are the same:
Both take up too much space on the bed
Both have irrational fears re vacuum cleaning
Both are threatened by their own kind
Both mark their own territory
Both are bad at asking questions
Neither tells you what is bothering them
Both have an inordinate fascination with women's crotches
Neither does any dishes
Both fart shamelessly
Neither of them notice when you have a new haircut
Both like dominance games
Both are suspicious of the Postman
Neither knows how to talk on the telephone
Neither understands what you see in cats
How Dogs are BETTER than men
Dogs don't have a problem expressing affection in public
Dogs feel guilt when they've done something wrong
Dogs admit when they are jealous
Dogs are very direct about wanting to go out
Dogs don't play games with you except fetch (and they never laugh at the way you throw)
Dog don't feel threatened by your intelligence
You can train a dog
You are never suspicious of your dog's dreams
The worst social disease you can get from dogs is fleas. (OK the worst disease is rabies but there is a vaccine for it and you get to kill the one that gave it to you.)
Dogs understand what "no" means
Dogs understand when some of their friends can't come inside
Middle-aged dogs don't feel the need to abandon you for a younger owner
Dogs admit it when they are lost
Dogs are colour blind
Dogs aren't threatened if you earn more than they do
Dogs mean it when they kiss you.