"Entrance Test" joke
A garbage collector, a teacher and a lawyer all die and go to heaven. When they arrive at the Pearly Gates, St. Peter meets them and informs them there will be a test before they can enter. Each of them must answer one question.
First, St. Peter asks the teacher, "Can you name the ship that crashed into an iceberg and sank with all its passengers?"
Thinking for a moment, the teacher replies, "I believe that would be the Titanic." "Correct," says St. Peter and the teacher enters.
St. Peter turns to the garbage collector next and figuring that Heaven really doesn't need all the smell that guy would bring in with him, he decides to make the question a little more difficult. "How many people died on the ship?" he asks.
Taking a wild guess, the garbage man says, "1228." "That happens to be right, you may enter," says St. Peter.
Finally, St. Peter turns to the lawyer, "Name them!"
1. The garbage collector is not stealing our stuff.
2. I do not need to suddenly stand straight up when I'm lying under the coffee table.
3. I will not roll my toys behind the fridge, behind the sofa or under the bed.
4. I must shake the rainwater out of my fur more...