"Funny But True" joke
A South African man has just broken the world record for the longest sustained "hard on". The old record of 17 days was smashed, when the man injected himself with Caverjet, a medication to fight erectile disfunction. The formula didn't mix to well with his bodybuilding steriods, and he wound up in a Johannesburg hospital with a 22 day boner.
A chinese restaurant owner, famous for his snake dishes was killed by two reptiles he had just decapitated. The serpents freshly severed heads were left on the kitchen bench, and as the man went to pick them up, both sank their fangs into his hands, and with their deadly venom, killed him.
3 janitors tried to get rid of a gopher at a school in California by trying to spray it to death with a solvent used to freeze chewing gum, so you can pick it up. The men used several cans to pursue the gopher, but to no avail, until one lit up a cigarette, which then blew the janitors out the room, hospitalised them and 16 pupils in the process..... the gopher still exists to this day.
A male stripper from Grimsby in north England, knocked out a woman on her hens night with his penis. After getting out his 30cm long todger, he proceeded to wave it about near her face, catching her on the side of the head, with the head.... knocking her sidewards where she hit her head on a table rendering her unconsious, missing most of her hens night.
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