"Funny Story" joke

I was glancing over the front page of the Post Gazette the other day and
saw that Alf Landon (Franklin Roosevelt's opponent in the 1936 election) had
died at age 100. It reminded me of this story that FDR supposedly liked to
tell.
There was a man who, everyday, would buy a newspaper on the way to work,
glance at the headline, and hand it back to the newsboy. Day after day the
man would go through this routine. Finally the newsboy could not stand it
and he asked the man, "Why do you always buy a paper and only look at the
front page before discarding it?"
The man replied, "I am only interested in the obituaries."
"But they are on page 21. You never even unfold the newspaper."
"Young man," he said, "the son of a bitch I'm looking for will be on the
front page."