"Hong Kong Movie Translations" joke
A list of actual English subtitles used in films made in Hong Kong: I am damn unsatisfied to be killed in this way. Fatty, you with your thick face have hurt my instep. Gun wounds again? Same old rules: no eyes, no groin. A normal person wouldn't steal pituitaries. Damn, I'll burn you into a BBQ chicken! How can you use my intestines as a gift? Who gave you the nerve to get killed here? Quiet or I'll blow your throat up. You always use violence. I should've ordered glutinous rice chicken. I'll fire aimlessly if you don't come out! You daring lousy guy. Beat him out of recognizable shape! I have been scared sh*tless too much lately. I got knife scars more than the number of your leg's hair! Beware! Your bones are going to be disconnected. The bullets inside are very hot. Why do I feel so cold?
And finally...
Take my advice, or I'll spank you without pants.
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