"Inappropriate Christmas Gifts" joke

Li'l Naturalist Hornet Farm.
The Duncan Yo -- Goes down, never comes back. Teaches children about warranties.
5, 200 Pick Up -- a jumbo deck of cards that lets kids play a larger version of their favorite game.
The "Learn About Puberty Chia Pet".
Supersoaker 9000: For use on those hard to reach targets; NFL referees, low flying planes, and many more. At close range it can strip paint, clean rusty grills, and dig utility trenches.
The Laff-O-Minit Spellin' Tootor.
Doggie Dentist -- Kids learn about dentistry on the family pooch.
Cuisin-Art -- Turns mommy's food processor into a spinning paint tool.
Water Retention Wanda -- Teaches kids the principles of the calendar.
Chocolate Covered Lead Soldiers.
Islamic Strip Poker -- lose a hand, lose a hand.