"It Was Almost Midnight" joke
It was almost midnight and the attractive, well-stacked woman had been standing at the bus stop for over half an hour, obviously several Martinis past her limit, when up drove a personable-appearing chap with an offer of transportation home.
Sliding into the seat beside him, the inebriated miss managed to mumble her address, then slumped drowsily against the fellow's shoulder. Responding to the opportunity, the driver wrapped his free arm around his pretty passenger and pressed her closer to him, proceeding with as personal an appraisal of the terrain as possible without taking his eyes off the road, or his other hand off the wheel.
At first she seemed oblivious to what was going on, but then she came to life, exclaiming, "Man, you're passionate!"
Quite naturally flattered by this apparent reference to his romantic technique, he attempted to take further liberties and was promptly greeted with a stinging slap across the face.
Stopping the car abruptly, he turned to her angrily and said: "Look, lady, on the one hand you tell me how passionate I am and with the other you smack me. Why don't you make up your mind?"
"I don't know what you're talkin' about, mishter," came the slurred reply, "but all I was referring to was my house-I said you're pashin' it!"
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