"It's better to be wanted for murder" joke

Ya mama so fat the only thing stopping her from going to Jenny Craig is the door.

Person 1: Knock, Knock
Person 2: Who's there?
Person 1: Cows go.
Person 2: Cows go who?
Person 1: No, silly! Cows go moo!

You mamma is soo fat she sat on a rainbow and skittles popped out!

Your momma is so fat when she fell in the grand canyon she got stuck half way down.

Don't knock on Death's door.
Instead, ring the bell and run. Death hates that...