"Jamaica" joke
A blonde gets on an airplane and sits down in the first class section. The stewardess tells her she must move to coach because she doesn't have a first class ticket.
The blonde replies, "I'm blonde, I'm smart and I have a good job and I'm staying in first class until we reach Jamaica".
The stewardess gets the Head Stewardess who asks the woman to leave and she again responds "I'm blonde, I'm smart, I have a good job and I'm staying in first class until we reach Jamaica".
The stewardesses don't know what to do because they have to get the rest of the passengers seated to take off, so they get the co-pilot.
The co-pilot goes up to the blonde and whispers in her ear. She immediately gets up and goes to her seat in the coach section.
The head stewardess asks the co-pilot what he said to get her to move. The co-pilot replies, "I told her the front half of the airplane wasn't going to Jamaica".
A woman was leaving a 7-11 with her morning coffee when she noticed a most unusual funeral procession approaching the nearby cemetery. A long black hearse was followed by a second long black hearse about 50 feet behind. Behind the second hearse was a solitary woman walking a pit more...
your momas so fat when she steped on a scale the scale said o shit i want ur weight not ur fone number
A couple was invited to a swanky masked Halloween Party. She got a terrible headache and told her husband to go to the party alone. He, being a devoted husband, protested, but she argued and said she was going to take some aspirin and go to bed, and there was no need of his good more...
Jim had a date with a really, hot blonde and in preparation for it, he went on the rooftop of his apartment building to get a tan. Not wanting to have any tan lines, he decided to sunbathe in the nude. Unfortunately, Jim fell asleep. When he finally woke up, he was sunburned more...
I was in the restaurant yesterday when I suddenly realized I desperately
needed to pass gas. The music was really, really loud, so I timed my
gas with the beat of the music.
After a couple of songs, I started to feel better. I finished my coffee,
and more...