"Life Hints" joke

Here is a list of thing that may help your life in this compex world of ours.
1. If you're bidding on a job for UPS, don't send your bid by FedEx.
2. If your computer says, "Printer out of Paper," this problem cannot be resolved by
continuously clicking the "OK" button.
3. If you want your refrigerator's ice maker to work, you need to hook it to a water
source. Air doesn't make good ice unless it is mixed with water.
4. No matter how much data you add to your laptop, it will not get heavier.
5. A bad place to store your emergency backup diskette is on the underside of your desk
drawer, secured by a large magnet.
6. It's okay to use the Polaroid Land Camera on a boat.
7. When the PC says, "Insert diskette #2," don't do it immediately. Remove disk #1 first,
even if you're sure you can make them both fit in there.
8. When your PC says "You have mail," don't go to the company mail room and look for a
package.
9. The French version of Netscape Navigator doesn't translate English language web pages
into French.
10. If you're in the armed services, and it's April 1st, and you get an e-mail message to
call Colonel Sanders for new orders, don't.
11. If you go to the computer store to buy a mousepad, you don't have to specify whether
it's for a Windows or a Macintosh.