"Making Presents," joke

Dear friends and family,
I shall be making your Christmas presents this year, so let me
know your sizes. Christmas is tight for me this year, but I've
learned to make bedroom slippers out of maxi pads You need four
maxis to make a pair. Two of them get laid out flat, for the foot
part. The other two wrap around the toe area to form the top.
Tape or glue each side of the top pieces to the bottom of the
foot part. Then decorate the tops with whatever you desire, silk
flowers, etc. and you're done.
These slippers are soft AND Hygienic. Non-slip grip strips on
the soles, plus the built-in deodorant feature keeps feet smelling
fresh. No more bending over to mop up spills, either! They're
disposable and biodegradable, and environmentally safe. Not only
that, but they come in three convenient sizes, Regular, Light day,
and Get out the Sand Bags.
Have the Happiest of holidays........