"Obituary Notice" joke

Ranil goes to the newspaper vendor every morning, reads the front page headline and returns the paper. When this continued for several days the vendor asked Ranil, "Sir, everyday you read only the headline and return the paper. Are you looking for some special news?"
"Yes, I'm looking for an obituary notice"
"But Sir, obituary notices are on page 11"
No, this fellow whom I want dead will make the headlines if he dies"

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