"Priceless - Saying the Right Thing at the Right Time" joke
Marty wakes up at home with a huge hangover. He forces himself to open his eyes, and the first thing he sees is a couple of aspirins and a glass of water on the side table. He sits up and sees his clothing in front of him, all clean and pressed. Marty looks around the room and sees that it is in perfect order, spotless, clean. So is the rest of the house.He takes the aspirins and notices a note on the table "Honey, breakfast is on the stove, I left early to go shopping. Love you." So he goes to the kitchen and sure enough, there is a hot steak and eggs breakfast and the morning newspaper. His son is also at the table, eating.Marty asks, "Son, what happened last night?" His son says, "Well, you came home about 3 A.M., blind stinking drunk and delirious. Broke some furniture, puked in the hallway, and gave yourself a black eye when you stumbled into the door."Confused, Marty asks, "So, why did Mom put everything in order and so clean, with breakfast on the table waiting for me?" His son replied, "Oh that! Mom and I dragged you to the bedroom, and when she tried to take your pants off, you said, "Lady, leave me alone! I'm a happily married man!"Self-induced hangover - $70.00
Broken furniture - $250.00
Breakfast - $10.00
Saying the right thing at the right time - priceless
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