Hangover Jokes

Bud and Jim were a couple of drinking buddies who worked as airplane mechanics in Atlanta. One day the airport was fogged in and they were stuck in the hangar with nothing to do.
Bud says, "Man, I wish we had something to drink!" Jim says, "Me too. Y'know, I've heard you can drink jet fuel and get a buzz. You wanna try it?" So they pour themselves a couple of glasses of high octane hooch and get completely smashed.
The next morning Bud wakes up and is surprised at how good he feels. In fact he feels GREAT! NO hangover! NO bad side effects. Nothing! Then the phone rings... It's Jim.
Jim says, "Hey, how do you feel this morning?" Bud says, "I feel great. How about you?" Jim says, "I feel great, too. You don't have a hangover?" Bud says, "No, that jet fuel is great stuff -- no hangover, nothing. We ought to do this more often." "Yeah, well there's just one thing..." "What's that?" "Have more...

A couple of drinkin buddies who are airplane mechanics are in the hanger at JFK airport in New York; it's fogged over and they have nothing to do. One of them says to the other, "Man, have you got anything to drink?" The other one says, "Nah, but I hear you can drink jet fuel and that will give you a buzz." So they decide to try the jet fuel, they get trashed and have a good old time like only drinkin buddies can do. The following morning one of them wakes up and is afraid to sit up for fear his head will explode from the awful hangover he's going to have. He gets up and feels good, in fact he feels GREAT! NO HANGOVER! The phone rings and it's his buddy. The buddy says, "Hey how are you feeling this morning? I'm actually feeling really good!" The buddy says, "Me too! I feel great! Man that jet fuel is great stuff! No hangover...we ought to do this more often!" "Yeah, we could but there's just one thing...." "What's that?" more...

* One Star Hangover

No pain. No real feeling of illness. Your sleep last night was a mere disco nap which is giving you a whole lot of misplaced energy. Be glad that you are able to function relatively well. However, you are still parched. You can drink 10 sodas and still feel this way. Even vegetarians are craving a huge steak and a side of gravy fries.

** Two Star Hangover No pain.

Something is definitely amiss. You may look okay but you have the attention span and mental capacity of a staple gun. The coffee/coca-cola you chug to try and remain focused is only exacerbating your rumbling gut, which is craving a Bacon & Egg McMuffin combo (with orange juice!!!). Last night has wreaked havoc on your bowels and even though you have a nice demeanour about the office, you are costing your employer valuable money because all you really can handle is surfing the internet and writing junk e-mails.

*** Three Star Hangover Slight more...

A couple of airplane mechanics are kicked out of the local bar and,
with no place else to go, end up in the hanger at SFO. One of them
says to the other, "Man, have you got anything to drink?" "Nah, but I
hear you can drink jet fuel - that'll kinda give you a buzz."
So they get smashed and have a beautiful time; like only drinking
buddies can do. The following morning, one of them wakes up and he
knows his head will explode if he gets up. But It doesn't. He gets up
and feels good, in fact he feels great - NO hangover! The phone
rings, it's his buddy. the buddy says "Hey, how do you feel?"
He said, "I feel great!!, and the buddy says, "I feel great too! You
don't have a hangover?" and he says "No - that jet fuel is great stuff
- no hangover - we ought to do this more often" "Yeah, we could, but
there's just one thing....
Did you fart yet?"
"No... more...

One Star Hangover (*)
No pain. No real feeling of illness. You're able to function
relatively well. However, you are still parched. You can drink
5 sodas and still feel this way. For some reason, you are
craving a steak & fries.
Two Star Hangover (**)
No pain, but something is definitely amiss. You may look okay,
but you have the mental capacity of a staple gun. The coffee
you are chugging is only increasing your rumbling gut, which
is still tossing around the fruity pancake from the 3:00 AM
Waffle House excursion.
Three Star Hangover (***)
Slight headache. Stomach in knots. You are definitely not
productive. Anytime a girl walks by you gag because her perfume
reminds you of the flavored schnapps shots your alcoholic
friends dared you to drink. Life would be better right now
if you were home in your bed watching Lucy reruns. You've had
4 cups of coffee, a gallon of water, 3 iced teas and a diet
Coke - yet you more...