"Priest and Rabbi" joke

(Heard this one from a minister at a pre-wedding party:)
A priest and a rabbi operated a church and a synagogue across the
street from each other. Since their schedules intertwined, they
decided to go in together to buy a car. So they did. They drove it
home and parked it in the street between their establishments.
A few minutes later, the rabbi looked out and saw the priest sprinkling
water on their new car. It didn't need a wash, so he ran out and asked
the priest what he was doing. "I'm blessing it," the priest replied.
The rabbi replied "Oh," then he ran back into the synagogue. He
reappeared a few minutes later with a hack saw, ran to the car and cut
off the last 2 inches of the tailpipe.

An American businessman was at the pier of a small coastal Mexican village when a small boat with just one fisherman docked. Inside the small boat were several large yellow fin tuna.
The American complimented the Mexican on the quality of his fish and asked how long it took more...

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A couple of hunters are out in the woods when one of them falls to the ground. He doesn't seem to be breathing, his eyes are rolled back in his head. The other guy whips out his cell phone and calls the emergency services. He gasps to the operator: “My friend is dead! What can more...

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Why is lemon juice made with artificial flavor, and dishwashing liquid made
with real lemons?

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After many years, a young Jewish Talmud student who had left the old country for America returns to visit the family.
"But-where is your beard?" asks his mother upon seeing him.
"Mama," he replies, "in America, nobody wears a more...

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The best way to combat criminals is by not voting for them.

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