"Programming Revisited" joke

Windows 95 is a 32 bit extension for a 16 bit patch to an 8 bit operating system originally coded for a 4 bit microprocessor by a 2 bit company that can't stand 1 bit of competition.

Have you heard about the new Cray super computer? It's so fast, it executes an infinite loop in 6 seconds.

If God had intended Man to program, we would be born with serial I/O ports.

The generation of random numbers is too important to be left to chance.

The computer is mightier than the pen, the sword, and usually, the programmer.

The determined programmer can write a COBOL program in any language.

Every program is either trivial or it contains at least one bug.

Al-gor-ithm" means "The unscrupulous technique of continuing to count and re-count until you get the result you want." (Sent by Gary Gilmore)

Don't get sucked in by comments--only debug code.

If cars had followed the same developmental path as computers, a Rolls Royce would cost $100, get a million miles per gallon, and crash once a year.

If builders built buildings the way programmers write programs, then the first woodpecker to come along would destroy civilization.

Demo-oriented programming: A programming style, typically used by startups, focusing on the demo of the program being developed, so it will easily catch the prospective investor.