"Salesmen Look Good" joke

How many lawyers does it take to change a light bulb?
You won't find a lawyer who can change a light bulb. Now, if you're looking for a lawyer to screw a light bulb. . .
How many lawyers does it take to screw in a light bulb?
Three. One to climb the ladder. One to shake it. And one to sue the ladder company.
If a lawyer and an IRS agent were both drowning, and you could only save one of them, would you go to lunch or read the paper?
What are lawyers good for?
They make used car salesmen look good.
What did the lawyer name his daughter?
Sue.
What did the terrorist that hijacked a jumbo-jet full of lawyers do?
He threatened to release one every hour if his demands weren't met.
What do dinosaurs and decent lawyers have in common?
They're both extinct.
What do lawyers and sperm have in common?
It takes 300, 000 of them to make one human being.
What do you call 25 attorneys buried up to their chins in cement?
Not enough cement.
What do you call 25 skydiving lawyers?
Skeet.