"Secrets Of The Music Biz 3" joke
17. The main accomplishment of Disney Studios was the film "Fantasia" in which they ripped-off Stravinsky's "Rite of Spring" by paying his agent $2500, of which Stravinsky received $500.
18. The value of a composer's agent is to convince the producer that using a music-cue library would not be cheaper than hiring a composer.
19. If there really is a Devil who is out to destroy the universe by means of vile conspiracies, and if God decides to deliver this message to humanity, He will not use, as His messenger - - Oliver Stone. But John Williams will write the score.
20. You should not confuse your lack of musical talent with your inferiority complex.
21. A movie producer who is suddenly nice to you is not really a nice person. It means he is thinking about hiring another composer, probably John Williams.
22. No matter what happens at a recording session (for example, the players shout "Bravo" and applaud) somebody will still find something wrong with your music, and the producer will begin to have doubts. Serious doubts.
23. When musical problems in a film arise and things look bad, there is always one individual who perceives a solution and is willing to take command. Very often, that individual is the producer's brother-in-law. He is a (budding) composer.
24. Your friends love you, even if you are tone-deaf.
25. Nobody cares if you can't compose music well. Just go ahead and compose. You are sure to succeed... if you suck up to the right person.
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