"Short jokes for women who hate men" joke

Q: What is the title of the thinnest book in the world?
A: "What men know about women"
Q: How many men does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A: "One... a man will screw anything"
Q: How does a man take a bubble bath?
A: "He eats beans for dinner"
Q: Why do women rub their eyes when they wake up?
A: "Because they don't have balls to scratch"
Q: What is a man's idea of foreplay?
A: "30 minutes of begging"
Q: How can you tell if a man is sexually excited?
A: "If he's breathing"
Q: What is the difference between men and government bonds?
A: "Bonds mature"
Q: What do men and beer bottles have in common?
A: "They are both empty from the neck up"
Q: How can you tell if a man is happy?
A: "Who cares"
Q: How many men does it take to change a roll of toilet paper?
A: "We don't know... It's never been done"
Q: How are men and parking spaces alike?
A: "The good ones are always taken and the ones that are left are handicapped"
Q: What is a man's idea of helping with the housework?
A: "Lifting his feet so you can vacuum"
Q: What is the difference between a man and E.T.?
A: "E.T. phoned home"
Q: What does a man consider to be a seven course meal?
A: "A hot dog and a six pack of beer"