"TOP TEN GIFTS SANTA HAS IN STORE FOR THE COMPUTER INDUSTRY'S BIG WIGS" joke

Exclusive news! A team of hackers managed to break into Santa's intranet this week and checked his database (twice) for the gifts he has in store for the computer industry's newsmakers, movers, and shakers. They leaked the list to CNET, and in the interests of public information, we're passing it on to you:
10. Marc Andreessen, Netscape: his own not-quite-evil empire.
9. Louis Rosetto, "Wired": a low-interest loan.
8. Trip Hawkins, 3DO: Nintendo 64.
7. Kim Polese, Marimba: subscriptions to every magazine whose cover she graced in 1996.
6. Larry Ellison, Oracle: Redmond.
5. Al Gore, U. S. government: An AOL account. And a clue.
4. Andy Grove, Intel: Prozac for his paranoia.
3. Phil Zimmermann, PGP: Get Out of Jail Free card.
2. Steve Case, AOL: $19. 95 from everyone in the world.
1. Bill Gates, Microsoft: peace on earth and good will toward Microsoft.