"Telling a Newfie joke in a bar" joke

Well, a stranger walks into a Nova Scotia bar and says to the bartender: "Hey, you wanna hear a great Newfie joke?"
The bartender snarls, stands up straight exposing his arms he uses for bouncing obstreperous customers and says, "Wait a minute. I'm a Newfie."
"And see that fellow over there by the jukebox with the chains? He works down at the ways and drags the boats up by hand. He's a Newfie."
"And that guy in the leather jacket with him, he repairs boat engines and he's a Newfie too. Now, do you still want to tell a Newfie joke?"
The visitor looks around at the other men and shakes his head, "Naw, I don't want to have to explain it three times."

Why is santa claus always so happy?
He knows where all of the bad girls live!

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How many letters are in the alphabet?
There are 11 letters in "THE ALPHABET"
Did you say 26? :)

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A man was helping one of his cows give birth, when he noticed his 5-year-old son standing wide-eyed at the fence, taking in the whole event.
The man thought, "Oh, this is just great... he's only 5 and I'm going to have to start explaining all about the birds and the more...

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Give a man a fish and he will eat for a day. Teach him how to fish, and he will sit in a boat and drink beer all day.

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Q: What's the difference between a pregnant woman and a lightbulb?
A: You can un-screw a lightbulb!

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