"The Patrol Officer" joke
The patrol officer had stopped the man for obvious drunken driving, but since the guy had a clean record, he made him park the car and took him home in the patrol car.
"Are you sure this is your house?" the cop asked as they drove into a rather fashionable neighborhood.
"Shertainly!" said the drunk, "and if you'll just open the door fer me, I can prove it to ya."
Entering the living room, he said, "You shee that pea ano? Thash mine.
You shee that giant tela vizzon set?
Thast mine too. Now follow me."
The police officer followed the man as he shakily negotiated the stairs to the second floor. The drunk pushed open the first door they came to. "Thish ish my bedroom," he announced.
"Shee that bed there? Thast mine!"
"Shee that woman lying in the bed? Thash my wife."
"And shee that guy lying next to her?"
"Yeah?" the cop replied suspiciously.
"Well, thash me!"
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