"The fastest way to a man's heart" joke

by Kria

Q: What is the fastest way to a man's heart?
A: Through his chest with a sharp knife.

Person 1: Knock, Knock
Person 2: Who's there?
Person 1: Cows go.
Person 2: Cows go who?
Person 1: No, silly! Cows go moo!

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A guy walks into a pub and sees a sign hanging over the bar which reads:
Cheese Sandwich: $1.50
Chicken Sandwich: $2.50
Hand Job: $10.00
Checking his wallet for the necessary payment, he walks up to the bar and beckons to one of the three exceptionally attractive more...

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Your Mamma's so fat, when she went bungee jumping, she broke the bridge!

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A woman was leaving a 7-11 with her morning coffee when she noticed a most unusual funeral procession approaching the nearby cemetery. A long black hearse was followed by a second long black hearse about 50 feet behind. Behind the second hearse was a solitary woman walking a pit more...

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A woman's breasts are like a child's toys. They are meant for the child - but the husband is the one that usually ends up playing with them.

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