"The maori slide" joke
There are three men a english falla,irish falla and a maori falla. there is a slide next to them, the genie says''ok when u slide down ths u can make a wish. So the english went first and said,''i wish for lots of Chocolate so he landed on a pile of chocolate and grabbed it and took it home with him. Then it was the irish's turn and he said,'' i wish for lots of gold so he landed on a pile of gold and grabbed it and ran home. Then the maori falla went on and he slipped and said,''i wish for OH SHIT!!
Once upon a time, there lived a man who had a terrible passion for baked beans.
He loved them, but they always had an embarrassing and somewhat lively reaction
on him. One day he met a girl and fell in love. When it was apparent that they
would marry, he thought to more...
A very attractive lady goes up to a bar in a quiet rural pub. She gestures alluringly to the bartender who comes over immediately. When he arrives, she seductively signals that he should bring his face closer to hers. When he does, she begins to gently caress his full more...
A greenhorn visiting Alaska was talking to two old sourdoughs. They informed him he was a cheechako. The greenhorn asked how he could become a sourdough.
The two sourdoughs winked at each other, and told him he had to do three things. First, he had to pee in the Yukon River. more...
Knowledge is knowing a tomato is a fruit; Wisdom is not putting it in a fruit salad.
I'm hungry:
"I could eat the crotch out of a dead leper's undies."
"I could eat the horse and chase the jockey."
"So hungry I'd eat a shit sandwich, only I don't like bread."
"I could eat the arse out of a rag doll more...