"Top 10 resolutions you won't keep" joke

I will not buy magazines with AOL disks bound in just to get another 1.44MB disk.
I will stop sending email to my roommate.
I resolve to work with neglected children... my own.
I will answer my snail mail with the same enthusiasm I answer my email.
When I subscribe to a news group or mailing list, I will read all the mail I get from it.
I will stay on the computer as long as I want. What? OK, dear... I'm coming. Never mind.
No more downloads from alt.binaries.*
I resolve to back up my new 2 GB hard drive daily... well, once a week... monthly, perhaps...
I will spend less than one hour a day on the Net.
I won't try to get onto the Netscape web site as soon as a new Navigator beta comes out.
When I hear "Where do you want to go today?" I won't reply "MS Tech Support."
I will read the manual.
I will think of a password other than "password."
I will limit my top ten lists to ten items.