"Top ten error messages" joke

The Top 10 Good Error Messages On The Brand New $7000 Computer You Just Bought
& & 1. "That URL was not found because frankly, I didn` try hard enough."
& & 2. "If you continue to type that way, you`ll get Carpal Tunnel Syndrome."
& & 3. "The Server is not really down, its just mildly depressed."
& & 4. "Normally, I would complain but I`ll let that rough disk insertion slide this time."
& & 5. "Don`t worry, I`ll clean up that beer stain."
& & 6. "Its not a virus... its a STD(System Transmitted Disease)."
& & 7. "Remember Einstein, its point then click, point then click."
& & 8. "That General Protection Fault is not yours."
& & 9. "You`re using MS Word 5. 0 and that`s a weenie version so why don`t I upgrade you for free?"
& 10. "I hate to tell you this but you have already seen that version of the Pamela Anderson video... may I suggest another?"