"Top ten signs your company is going to downsize" joke

Company Softball Team is converted to a Chess Club.
Dr.Kevorkian is hired as an "Outplacement Coordinator".
Your best looking women in Marketing are suddenly very friendly with the dorky Personnel Manager.
The beer supplied by the Company at picnics is Schlitz.
Weekly yard/bake sale at Corporate Headquarters.
Company President now driving a Ford Escort.
Annual Company Holiday Bash moved from the Sheraton to the local Taco Bell.
Employee discount days at the local "Army & Navy Surplus Store" are discontinued.
Dental plan now consists of a Company supplied kit (String, pliers and 2 aspirin).
Your CEO has installed a dart board in his office marked with all existing departments in the Company.
Remember folks, "We're not Downsizing, we're Rightsizing!"