"Typical night in my town by Andrew Burch" joke

Typical night in Yuma, Arizona ..Here's where it went downhill:

Me: what are you doing later?
Her: picking up "my kid"
Me: right on, full work week starts tomorrow..
Her: O, I don't work.
Me: School?
Her: not yet, hey I need a smoke.
Me: right on......
Her: can you order me another drink.
Me: I gotta go...

My mate Dave is serving a life sentence for something he didn't do.
He didn't wipe his fingerprints off the knife.

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A very attractive lady goes up to a bar in a quiet rural pub. She gestures alluringly to the bartender who comes over immediately. When he arrives, she seductively signals that he should bring his face closer to hers. When he does, she begins to gently caress his full more...

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Why is santa claus always so happy?
He knows where all of the bad girls live!

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Q: What is the similarity between a rubix cube and a dick?
A: The more you play with them, the harder they get!

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I was in the restaurant yesterday when I suddenly realized I desperately
needed to pass gas. The music was really, really loud, so I timed my
gas with the beat of the music.

After a couple of songs, I started to feel better. I finished my coffee,
and more...

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